Recently, one of my friends and colleague told me that when she starts establishing a connection with men, almost immediately they start sending  pictures of their penises via text messages. My friend is not a puritan or  conservative, but the incidence of these events happening made her a little   disturbed. “Why do men send pictures of their penises, right away, when they   start talking to women?”, she asked.


The answer I provided was multipart. For starters, a man who is not at least a little proud of his penis and who does not think his penis is worth an early episode of “show and tell” will not send such picture. So, in a
way, this is the way of men to show their “endowment”. Of course, these pictures are always of erect penises, never flaccid. Men want to “advertise” their merchandise and start a game of “peek-a-boo” that will be reciprocal. They want to receive a like picture in return.


But why, oh why? Well, men are visual creatures. Not that women do not get aroused visually, but men are notorious for being sexually stimulated by visual “aids”. And, although this argument may sound stereotypical, a man who sends a picture of his penis right after an exchange of phone numbers is
suggesting that what he is interested in is a sexual relationship ASAP; no “lovie-dovie” involved, just sex. The pictures of the proud possession of men, their erect and perfect penis, is their oscillating flag letting us women know that, if we trespass, it should be clear that we are not going in for love or romance, we are going in for sex. And men believe we will be as enticed by the picture of their merchandise as they would if we were the sender and they were the recipient.


I advise that, if the receiver does not appreciate the picture, express so. Just like when you go to a store and they offer you a piece of clothing or a pair of shoes, can kindly decline and say “beautiful, but I am not
interested”. If you are, just play along and be warned. 

Picture: www.freedigitalphotos.net

Many times, men use porn as their “sex university” and then go on in life trying to emulate what they see in porn movies. Women also believe what they see in porn and often times end up dissatisfied when the experience of sex is not as the ones portrayed in porn movies. Do not believe everything you see in porn!

Porn can be a good outlet for arousal and to certainly learn new tricks to apply in the bedroom. However, it is important that all who watch porn realize that most porn is geared towards men and that many of the characters in porn are actors, actresses and athletes performing their part. For instance, 75% of women do not reach orgasm through intercourse. Furthermore, constant thrusting can hurt, irritate and dry the most moist vagina. I would dare to assert that the vast majority of women cannot perform oral sex on a penis for more than 5 consecutive minutes without hurting their jaw. Besides, many women may not enjoy their boobs squeezed to the point of turning them blue during intercourse or to be savagely pounded (and only pounded) for hours on end during lovemaking. 

Usually, porn depicts only some oral sex, in the case of heterosexual porn, usually women performing oral sex on a penis forever! And then the “pounding” begins until the guy ejaculates, usually on the woman’s
face.  Although there is nothing wrong with oral sex and coming on someone’s face (only if they allow it, of
course), that is not all that sex is! Sex should be about intimacy and using your creativity and imagination to reach new levels of pleasure with whom you choose to have that sexual experience. 
 
Therefore, do not use porn as your standard for sex. Rather, use it to complement your sexual activity and to get some ideas to apply in the real world. Remember, what you and your partner want in bed is more important than reenacting porn sexual acts.

Photo: Grasp by Stephen Perry www.obsessionart.com